You are currently browsing the monthly archive for June 2011.

Rainy sesom arrived.

Opened window, watching rain and green lieves, sitting on favorate chair with …Special sweets!


Steamed custard

Ingredients for 4 cups; A( milk 250cc, whipping cream 100cc), Rum, B(1 egg, 2 egg yolk, sugar 35g)

Put A in a small pot. Heat until body temperature. Add Rum. Remove from the heat.

In another small bowl mix B well.

Pour small amount of A into B,  mix well. Add more, mix well till all together.

Filter the mixture and pour into cups.

Boil water in big pot or  use steamer.

If the big pot, place  wire shelf for the cups above water.

By whichever way, for making flat surface, place a long chopsticks horizontally between the upper edge of the pot and cover. So there is narrow space between the pot and cover. Steam about 20 min till surface is done.


It can be eaten as hot or cool. I love hot one. It’s special treats.

Place bitter chocolate on it, when it has just finished cooking. Cover with wrap. The chocolate melts down as sauce. Eat when it is still warm.


Birds start singing. Sky is getting bright. It will stop raining.

In Japanese language ‘I’m sorry’ is used very often.  Very often it means ‘Thank you’.

When I started speaking English, I often said ‘I’m sorry’. Others said to me ‘? You are not sorry at all.’ ‘Ooops! I mean thank you’. 


In Thai language ‘Give me punishment’ means ‘I’m sorry’. This words include the system which  being said ‘Never mind’. The parson who is apologized should forgive immediatly.


In whatever languages, 

some times we are said and  need to say ‘I’m sorry’.

Maybe only words for avoiding problems.

Maybe in habit of saying.

Maybe from review.

Maybe from regret.


The words being sayed often bring lighter meaning.

The words without feeling bring opposite meaning.

Can be seen.



I want to say ‘I’m sorry’ from the bottom of heart, when the words are needed.

I want to be mindful. Then no one need to be sorry.

I want to thank more.

I meet people helping others from their will. Heart waming.

Some people give helps with expecting  paying back directly, like trading. The paying back is limited by the amounts which was payed. Their expectations are never full-filled.  They are frustrated.


I looked after a girl for two years.

When she left from me, she asked how she could repay.

I thought about my Mum and Dad and said,


You are young.

No need to repay anything to me, might forget me.

But repay to others who needs your help. That is enough.


The days being with her, I got repayed from her happy face every day.

Since then I’ve been helped by her and the people around me.

Unlimited repayment.

Having been soaked in warm water about 24 hours, brown rice is awaken and starts glowing. I see their lives. It’s time to cook.

Before cooking it needs to be drained the dirty water out, rinsed with new water several times.


From the very start of their lives, stain comes out.

Where stain comes from? There are only seeds, water and air.


Life includes stain in itself.

With accepting it, still pay efforts for purification.

The struggles bring  the worth of life.

Justin says when in Savasana, dead body pose, face needs to be up. Tilied head brings sleep.

True for me. When I fall asleep, I need to lay down on one side.


Before first operation I prepared powder beads cusion for good sleep.

I got at home-deco shop very inside of Paragon depertment store 4th floor. The brand is named ‘Cotton field’. MUJI has some powder beads product too.


Just after operation I laid down on my back.

Placed the cushion under the operation-side shoulder for preventing  too much tension at the cut.


After I could lay down on one side.

Place it between the boobs for bringing the upper side body weight to the bed. It was also for keeping the implant in suitable place. The implant was movable for a while.

Then I could sleep comfortably.

I still use the powder beads cushion. Inside of cushion is filled by tiny tiny beads. The beads emit heat out. My support is cool all the night.


Sweet cool dreams.









‘I like your toiletries.’ My big sister said, when she stayed my place.

I might had too much chemical in chemotherapy. After that I got chemical allergy. So I go natural products…in resonable price.

A Thai brand ‘Khaokho Talaypu’.

It comes from North Thailand Pechabun prefecture. Their natural farm has 320,000 square meter in the high mountains. The products are veges, foods and toiletries, based on Thai herbs.


I often buy from their shop, which is behind veges in Paragon super market.

I enjoy asking which herb is good for my condition.

Aloe vera for moiture, turmeric for white skin, butterfly pea for black hair, kaffir lime for healthy hair.

Coconut oil for whole body. Sweet sweet fregrance.

Am I sweet girl?

In classical Parsvottanasana, intense side stretch pose, torso is extended forwards with palms togather ‘Namaste’ behind the back. This is hard pose.


One day Les taught me the fingers and palms are indicators.

Thumbs touching each other indicate chest is opened enough.  Spine being away from little fingers indicate spine is concaved.

‘Namaste’ behind the back is indicator. Purpose is opened chest and concaved spine.


Once people know the classical pose, try to do it without knowing why ‘Namaste’.

They tend to just turn the wrists for thumbs togather, making shape instantly.

In this moment ‘Namaste’ become purpose.


We often loose purpose but concern indicator, how others see us.

Ego drives.


Instead ‘Namaste’, hold the elbows each other behind the back. This brings more possibilities to open chest, concave spine.  Our bodies are not same. Full fill today’s purpose.  That is enough. ‘Namaste’ might be for tomorrow.


Remind purpose, our happiness.

Even though I like white one now, first time I ate dragon fruits, I was desappointed. It looked very hot outside but too curt inside, that I didn’t expect.

Red dragon fruits is another matter. Inside has strong impression as same as outside. Taste is creamy. I love it.

The red color is phytochemical, contains anthocyanins.

I like make red dragon fruits yogurt ice-cream. Cute pink color with dots.


Soaking the skin or pulp changes liquid into red. Natural color.

By the liquid I make jelly-like sweets in pink for celebration. In Japan red and white is auspicious color.

Lucky gift from nature to you!

Nurse reveals the top 5 regrets people make on their deathbed

By Bronnie Ware (who worked for years nursing the dying)

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself,
     not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. 
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it. 

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.


This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. 
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle. 


3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings. 


Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result. 

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly,in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.


4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. 

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved.Everyone misses their friends when they are dying. 
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip.But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks,love and relationships. 



5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.


This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have sillyness in their life again. 
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again,long before you are dying. 


her website:

Photo by Joseph

Finish shopping in hot weekend market, I like to have coconuts ice-cream at the corner of gate. There is one more favorate dessert, called ‘Chao Kuai’.


‘Chao Kuai’ is ebony herb-jelly, made from herb ‘Chinese mesona’, which makes body cool down from inside.

When the greenish herb is squeezed, sticky paste comes out from it.  Being mixed into water and  a little starch, it makes shape. Very simple vege sweets.


There are 2 kind, hard one and soft one. Hard one has various shapes, is sold with syrup and crushed ice.

I like soft one, being sold in bottle, with some cream, brown sugar and fruits.


Cool ebony sweetness flows though the throat!


See the herb in

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