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‘Consciousness makes body shape, not muscles.

Where consciousness touches strongly becomes hill.

Where consciousness doesn’t touch at all becomes valley.

When consciousness spreads evenly, smoothness comes, Integration comes.’

Birjoo-ji said.


I struggled my left side upper back. It was always rounded.

Because implant in left breast pulls everything towards front.

I tried to pull left shoulder blade in as opposed movement, which was no win.


Left breast looks like hill, but is valley. Hollow is inside. So back is hill.


Let consciousness touches implant, the hollow.

Fill the hollow which I tried to forget its existence.

Fill the new room with joy of alive.


Valley become hill. Integration comes.



I was in amazing Birjoo-ji’s workshops in KL.


Ice cubes-Ego are everywhere inside me, blocks movement of body and mind.

Lotus on water


Fire of effort-Tapas melt them down.

Ice cubes transform into water-Consciousness.

Water smooth inside, gather at the center.


With further Tapas, evaporation happens.

Steam of sparks-Intelligence fill up inside,

create my shape without me.


See the bliss

Sparks goes beyond the body.



In my tropical home – Bangkok, I got a lots of dried fruits.

Many kinds of them are available in Royal project shops, Lemon farm.

Bake bars from fruits paradise. Get Sunny vibe for today.


Tropical bar

8cm x 4cm 9 pieces or 18cm square

Put following in a big bowl.

150g dried fruits (Mango, Cherry tomato and raisin etc. cut into small size, if it needs), 80g mixed nuts (Macadamia and Cashew nuts etc. ground), 50g rolled grains, 50g whole wheat flower, 1.5tsp baking powder, 50g desiccated coconuts, 30g pumpkin seeds, 1 piece of banana(fresh, ground until puree) and 1 pack of coconuts cream (200ml).

Mix from the bottom until nearly mixed. Don’t knead.

Place into the mold. Flatten the surface by finger tips gentry. Don’t push.

Bake it in 180 degree 25min.

If it’s in square mold, make cuts into bar shape. Sprinkle ground sea salt a bit.

Let it cool down. Take out from the mold. Keep in fridge.

Dad passed away.

The night before funeral, I stayed as a night keeper in front of his coffin.

No others were there.


In the morning I was asked whether I was scared or not.


At the hospital bed I witnessed his body stopped its function.

His life energy got difficult to stay.

With last exhale it started leaking out.


During funeral, monk’s chant guide it to go.

The density of his life energy got thinner and thinner.

At the end it was gone, melted into universal energy.


His body was there but he was not in it.

He is nowhere but everywhere.


No. I was not scared. He is with me.


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